Revenge at its Sweetest. The final chapter.

That next Monday, it took nearly all the money they had left to by the blanks needed to make copies of their recording of The BOB's slumber party. Friday they had already spent several dollars on batteries for their flash lights, and some more baseball cards. But it was so worth the price. T he boys needed to use grandma Meyers recorder to plug the camera into, to make the copies. But they would have to wait 3 more days. Monday was craft day at Grandmas house. All her friends would come over to create wonderful items for the County Fair competitions coming in the summer. Tuesday's were for cleaning, cooking, baking, and what Gram called 'muttering around the house day'. They couldn't be making copies with her right there. She'd have shut down Operation The BOB is Busted immediately. Wednesday was club day for practically everyone in town. Be it Boy Scouts, Awanas, the clubs at Church, or the women's and men's circles for charity. There was always something busy going on. That just left Thursday.

On Thursday, Grandma would be out grocery shopping and getting her hair done, so the boys offered to clean out the news papers and other junk from the basement giving them time and access to complete their Operation. Gram Meyers knew there was something up. She had a nose for these kinds of things. But this didn't smell like REALLY big trouble, so the boys got what they needed, and she got her basement cleaned out. Good trade she thought. And if they did a good job, Gram would later bake some cookies to say thank you. The waiting for each copy to be done was the hardest part for the boys. Neither one felt any comfort until they had made the first two. Just one recording could be destroyed too easily. Two copies meant there was more of a chance for one boy to escape to safety should the other get ambushed.

Coincidentally, at the time that the boys finished bringing all the garbage from the basement to the curb, the last copy was finished, and Gram Meyers was pulling in the drive. As Gram checked the mail box and backed into her parking spot, the boys raced back to grab their recordings, toss 'em in the back-pack, and unhook all the equipment. They ran back out side to help carry in the groceries, while Gram inspected the basement. Grandma Meyers was well pleased with the work that Stephen and Jarred had done. She offered to make them lunch, but they were too excited to eat. They had to get back to the club house. There was much planning to do with the now 6 copies of the Slumber Party Recording. Stephen had mentioned, early on, that as soon as they showed the first copy to the girls that it would surely be destroyed, but they had 5 others that would be hidden in strategic places around the neighborhood. Yes Ladies and Gentleman, boys and girls, Operation The BOB is Busted, was not just a plan for revenge, but was also a plan for potential Blackmail, and future protection from the BOB.

The boys could only gather 3 of the "BOB" members to come to the show, and the looks on their faces was well worth the danger of dealing with more than a 2 on 2 situation. Just before Stephen pushed play, Jarred made a speech about the other 5 copies, and that demands were not being made at this point and time. "However, you girls will want to quickly spread our good news to the other Gar-girls. We would hate for there to be any misunderstood rumors floating around." he finished. Stephen pushed play. The girls immediately started to bombard the boys with "You Pigs" "I'll kill you." Sandy said. "How dare y..." was cut off as Stephen pressed fast forward ( 'FF' )to the main attractions. The girls were now watching themselves dancing around, just like what they thought the high school cheerleaders would do during practice. They had no idea and just made it up as they went along. But it was definitely dance moves far too mature for these young girls to be mimicking.  The picture on the TV screen was not a pretty one, but it had to be done. Rrrruff! (Shameful! All you girls, just shameful! Guess I told them.) 'FFwd' Next came the scene where the girls would tell what boy they liked and what personal item they would give up just to get one kiss from him. 'FFwd' Then came the round of "Truth or Dare". Olla was the only one to take a Dare, and all Nancy could think to say, on such short notice, was to put one corn puff up each nostril. And Fast Forward, one last time, to the piece of resistance'....... The boys weren't sure what it was at the time of the party, because the camera eye piece got fogged up, and they weren't paying attention to the details as they were getting a bit bored waiting in the laundry room. Then, when they saw it for the first time, their eyes got just as big as the girls eyes were now. Sandy was handing out cigar halves for all the girls to try. "My dad won't know cause he smokes 'em down here all the time. And he thinks that Jarred has been sneeking them." She said. Then....Rhonda turned 3 shades of green on her first puff. Tammy threw up into the potato chips bowl, which made Elly get sick and make a mad dash for the bathroom two stories up. And Sandy, in all her pomp and circumstance, being the gracious host that she was, paniced and dropped her cigar half on her sleeping bag. That will be a hard burn mark to explain.

The girls faces turned red out of guilt and fear. The boys were still red do to embarrassment of watching (what they would later call) "The dance of the Flat Chested." Yeah, I know. Boys can be stupid sometimes. But back to the dumb things the girls got busted doing. "busted" Stephen whispered. "Busted." said Jarred. "BUSTED!" they both shouted. Stephen jumped in before any of the 3 girls could say anything "Our demands are going to be just as simple as it was to get this scary horror picture recorded." Sandy tried to speak "But how did you..." "Uh uh uh!" Jarred interrupted. "Continue Comrade." Stephen smiled, clasped his hands behind his back, and began to pace back and forth, like a General in some war movie they had recently watched. "For now, just know that it is going to cost you girls...er uh...Ladies allot, to either buy or earn the 6 copies we have placed in secured locations around town. You may have the first copy to share with the other "BOOB" members." Jarred snickered, and Sandy sneered at him. Stephen finished his speech. "In the event that you should capture and kill us both, not only will Henry eventually find and dig up one or two of the copies and bring them to your mom Sandy, just like he does with some bones and that shoe of yours. Good boy Henry." He reached down and scratched me under my chin. I do like that. "But our instructions on where to find the other copies, will surface for all four parents, if we go missing for too long." Jarred cleared his throat and stepped up next to Stephen. "We will begin with ....um....(the boys whispered to one another) .....oh yeah, we want 3 dozen chocolate chip cookies. Home made, NO nuts...NO POISON!  Other demands will follow. You are now free to go." he finished. Then Stephen reiterated "And remember, if there is any funny business, of any kind, we are pretty sure that the 7 members of the BOB will not only be disassembled, but most likely will be grounded until they are each 18." The boys started to walk away, but paused for a minute, turned and said at the same time "Thanks for playing our game. If you are wondering why, the only clue we will give is GOATS. And in case you have forgotten what we looked like in our birthday suites......." and they mooned the girls.
Yeah, even to a dog a boys shiney hiney is just wrong.  They are weird boys, but their my weird boys. 
Henry the Dog.

To quote a Bunny...

For as long as I can remember I have always loved Bugs Bunny. My favorites are the older toons, with the younger Bugs, just after he lost the yellow gloves, and the tips on his ears. Truly one of the greatest characters ever created. The attitude, the stubbornness, and the wrong turns at Albuquerque. Bugs emphasises all that we sometimes wish we could be. Free willed, free thinking, and free to do just about anything to make sure the bad guy doesn't get away with what ever bad thing he may be trying to do. Bugs is a "moment in time" kind of guy. Lives in the moment, doesn't take it lying down, and really loves to live.

So, as I do one of my monthly rituals of Google Imaging different people, places, and things. Yeah mostly Nouns. (Once in a while a verb.) I came across another Blog that had many Bugs Bunny Quotes "Great Sayings" . This is a really cool blog. It has tons of quotes from many sorces. It brought back many good memories. I still love to watch cartoons. Probably always will. This Blog had several other character quotes too. Another of my Fav's Spiderman. Definitely worth a visit.

To quote a Cali Friend of mine......"Peace, Love, and Granola!"
That's all Folks.

Sweet sweet REVENGE, Part 4

With cucumbers on their eyes, and their top 40 radio station blasting their favorite song of the week, while the gar-girls were singing so far out of tune they were almost back in (tune), they were very much unaware of the boys slipping in right under their snooty noses. Jarred stopped for a brief moment to do his hairy chicken leg dance in front Tammy, who's mother wouldn't let her start shaving for another 4 months. Stephen turned back to see the movement his peripheral vision caught of Jarred, and nearly dropped the tripod he was carrying. Silently he mouthed "WHAT ARE YOU DOING?" Leaning her head back, Rhonda pulled her legs up and crossed the into a pretzel, while Mindy's pinky finger reached up to scratch the drying facial cream on her nose. So the boys shifted it into high gear and headed into the laundry room. Once the sliding door to the back room was closed after them, both boys let out a sigh of relief that the girls didn't hear. The boys got to work.

The boys put their flash lights to work, after earlier covering most of the lens with tape to hide most of the light. Had they used the light in the laundry room the girls would have seen it shining through the crack in the door. The girls had exceptional attention to detail, and that would have been something they noticed quickly. Just as the DJ announced the next song, playing and all the girls screamed with excitement because they loved that song too, Stephen backed into one of Mrs. Crows wooden apple crates that she kept for empty bleach bottle storage, stumbled forward, and knocked of the tripod he had just set up. CRASH! ! The boys looked at each other with deadly fear filled eyes and just froze. In what seemed like an eternity of anticipation, 30 seconds passed with the girls all bellowing out nearly all the lyrics to the song playing, and the boys could now let their hearts start beating again. Using their sleeves to wipe the dripping sweat from their brows before it could get in their eyes, the boys so gently moved the crate and picked up the tripod. They moved everything else that was within reach, so as not to knock anything else down.

Jarred plugged in the extension cord, while Stephen set up the camera. There was a hole in the wall between the laundry and rumpus rooms that used to have a water pipe going through it. Mr. Crow just hadn't gotten around to patching it up yet. The hole was just big enough to get picture and by coincidence there wasn't any direct light shining toward it that would reflect off of the lens. They would have to take turns looking through the lens to see what was going on. "DARN!" Jarred whispered. "the tripod isn't high enough, and we forgot to consider that they might hear the noise the camera is going to make when they turn the music down." "Oh Cra..." Stephen started to say, and then he just smiled. He lowered the tripod, which made Jarred start to look panicked. He then grabbed two of the apple crates and set the camera on them. One other small adjustment and dun-da-da-da! Perfect height. Then he leaned in toward Jarred and said "We have two good sources of noise cover up. The refrigerator, and the dehumidifier. That will be plenty of noise along with the jabber jaws of The BOB." The boys both mimicked rapid mouth movements, and snickered under their breath.

Operation "The BOB is Busted" began. Because they could only watch one at a time, they would have to watch the video again later. The camera caught every thing from the ping pong table over to the edge of the couch. The only person partly out of shot was Elly, and that was not a problem to the boys. Because later, what the camera did catch, even if the boys were caught trying to escape, they had first stowed the recorded events in the one place the girls would never think to look or ever even touch. The Crow boys box of sports gear. And there could be jock straps in that box. At that point even torture from the girls would be a small price to pay for the gold mine they had just witnessed.

The boys had footage of the girls from about 8:30 pm thru 12:30 am, when the girls went up to peer out the window. There was only a total of three hours of recordings. Olla had once been day dreaming and staring off at the wall, and Jarred thought for sure that she had been looking right at him. He got scared and turned off the camera. And the other missing time came when the boys didn't realize that it was in monitor mode instead of record. So they packed up their gear, and headed up the stairs. Then, just when they got to the landing where the side door lead out to the driveway, they heard footsteps approaching. Quickly Jarred opened and shoved Stephen and himself into the utility/boot closet just next to the door. It was cramped, but this was life and death. Jarred looked at Stephen, sniffed, curled his nose and moaned quietly from the smell. Stephen just gave half a smile and blushed. As the air cleared, the girls were settling back into the basement just out of sight of the closet. The boys crept gently back up to the second floor, out the window, and back across the rope. Step one of the Operation was complete.

To be once more, continued...

Sweet sweet REVENGE, Part 3

The Crow family rumpus room had everything that most kids could want and more. Especially on those middle of winter, blizzard type, days. They had a Ping-pong and Foosball tables, two giant stow-a-bed couches, 4 or 5 bean bags, a refrigerator full of every kind of snack, and a pretty cool entertainment system for family movie night. The Crows had two folding card tables that doubled for board and card games, as well as science project stations. Off in the corner of the mostly wide open space was Mrs. Crows sewing machine and personal craft station. Mr. Crow had the garage for his hobbies. He was always ready to accept a challenge to his Championship title of KING OF THE PING PONG TABLE. Over by the fridge was a heavy duty two tub concrete wash basin. The Crow Boys had a few lessons on hand washing some abused socks and jeans in that tub. Mr. Crow believed boys would be boys, but there was no excuse for running out side with only socks on. Next to that was the laundry chute box. The chute went all the way up into the 2nd floor bathroom, where when you undressed to get your shower you would drop your clothes down to the basement. Since the laundry room was in the far back corner, Mr. Crow put wheels on the chute box. For their plan to be a success, the boys would need to sneak in and out of the laundry room with out being noticed.

Sandy had spent a few hours down in the basement, preparing for her guests. And several more up in the kitchen getting snacks ready. It drove the boys nuts trying to get down there with no success. It was like Sandy had radar focused on anyone who came near her parties. After hearing just one of the stairs, leading down to the rumpus room, squeak, she poised a fist and swung , luckily missing Mr. Crow coming down to change a light bulb. “I thought it was one of the boys coming to make a mess Daddy.” She said with her pouty bottom lip protruding ever so slyfully. Dad knew the pouty lip was fake and for gave the attempt anyway. “It’s okay princess.” He answered. She didn’t particularly like that nickname very much.

Through out an agonizing day of anticipation and anxiousness, the boys would find out that there would be but two chances to get in and out of the laundry room. Since no-one at the parties really talked all that much, the boys would have to rely on rumors for accurate time lines. And now, if rumors were true, and Sandy stuck to her regular agenda, the opportunities would include when the girls would start their “beauty regiment”. The music would be on high, organic facial mask applied on thick, and with heads tilted back, cucumbers placed on their eyes for 25 minutes. At this time the boys, could get in. (Food?!? They were putting food ON their faces instead of IN their faces. People are so strange.) The chance to get out would be during the time when the girls all went upstairs, at 12:30 sharp, to peek out of the big picture window in the front room, to see Mark Thompson come home from late night classes. Mark would come home, sit on the porch playing his acoustic guitar, and just unwind his mind. He was 23 years old and these “pre” and teen girls just thought that he was the coolest, cutest, and most handsome man alive. He was known in the neighborhood as the bad boy with the great smile. And the only reason he had the bad label attached was because his motorcycle was a bit to loud for the older folks. Other than the bike noise Mark was a model citizen, extra kind to the widows in need of house work, and more than generous with his time at both the kids shelter in the next town, and Grubervilles retirement home. At night he was studying to get his degree to be some kind of engineer. Anyway, all the googling and giggling that the girls would be doing would give ample time for the boys to escape from the paroles of having forced themselves to observe a girls sleep-over.

So the windows of opportunity were set, the equipment was ready, the boys were as anxious as a dog in a butcher shop, and there was nothing left to do but wait. So the boys decided that they would lay on club house roof and watch the clouds go by. And for only a moment, while they watched the evening sky reflect shades of orange, and red, and violet, did they loose track of time because they started to day-dream about the girls they both liked. But when they heard the undeniably recognizable sound of the girls screeching their hellos, they were brought straight away back to earth. “It’s time to implement Operation ‘T-B-I-B ‘. “ Stephen said. “Huh?!?” Jarred asked. “You know!” Stephen barked back. “Oh, yeah, Like Duh!” Jarred barked himself. ‘. “ Stephen said. “Huh?!?” Jarred asked. “You know!” Stephen barked back. “Oh, yeah, Like Duh!” Jarred barked himself. Did you notice? All I can say is PUH_LEEZ. The boys Barking!? If that was barking, they need to work on their accent, cause I didn’t understand a word. Funny though, I do tend to understand them a lot more when there is food involved.

Jarred handed Stephen a walkie talkie. “What’s this for?” he asked. Jarred dramatically looked around to see if anyone was listening. “In case we get separated and captured and need to call for help.” Stephen then moved in closer toward Jarred and said “Good idea comrade. You know the enemy as well as I do, and you know the kinds of torture they can inflict when they wanna know something.”

Well…this wasn’t all out war and the enemy was only the girls, but their brand of torture was not to be discounted or underestimated. In its own way it could make the kinds of torture that the boys saw in old war movies seem like a day fishing at the pond, which was the whole reason for the Operation. The girls have been known for holding a boy down and stuffing pudding up his nose. If they suspected that some boy had information that they wanted, they would gang wedgie him. And in cases where there was all out war, they have even gone to Defcon levels. In level 1 they would tickle some kid until he either gave up the information or wet himself. Level 2 was the 30 second make-over with lipstick, blush, and eye shadow. Level 3 was the 30 minute makeover (Stephen’s little brother James knew all about that. Once caught in the cross fire, he was tortured with mascara, lipstick, eye shadow, blush, hairpins, nail polish, and threats of Defcon 4) Defcon level 4 was a combination of levels 1 and 3, but with pictures taken for future blackmail. To this day, when ever cornered by 3 or more from the girls club, James has to recite the Pledge of “The BOB”. And he better not mess it up. “I pledge allegiance to Miss America, and all her beauty secrets. I will stand tall, and pretty, and walk with a delicate stride. In public or in private I will always present myself as a lady, crossing my legs when I sit, sipping not slurping, and always with my bosom’s held high.” Few of the BOB had even a bump that could be misinterpreted as bosom’s, but that was their pledge.

“Just trying to be ready for anything.” Jarred said while he squeezed the talkie button. “Testing, testing. 1-2-3.” And they started across the rope………………

to be continued…

Sweet sweet REVENGE. Part 2

The boys were excited that afternoon. They could hardly wait until the sun went down that night. As dusk started to fall they also began to count off their mission supplies. Stephen read from the list they made earlier (Which would later be shredded and each boy would eat his half to destroy incriminating evidence.) and Jarred would find the item and say ‘Check’ to confirm the items presence. “Head band flash lights” “CHECK”, “Gloves” “CHECK” “Extension cord.” “CHECK”, “Tripod” “CHECK”, “Video Camera” “CHECK” “And if anything happens to it, we’re both DEAD!” Stephen added. “And I had to make a promise to my grandma that included a ‘if anything happens to her video camera we will do every dirty job she wants done for the next 3 months…after our butts heal’ clause.” “Ahhh, it’ll be alright.” Jarred said “Don’t let your big goober head be worried about it. Is there a remote control for it?” “CHECK! Uh, I mean yeah.” Stephen answered. They both had on their most silent sneekers on. They brought their darkest clothes, and even found the matching ski masks they got for Christmas, but would have to turn them inside out to hide the yellow stripes.

It’s the night of “REVENGE”. Well, so to speak. Revenge comes in so many forms. You definitely have to make your choices wisely, and this one…this was a pretty wise choice. Especially for the boys. As night drew closer (sounds like a horror story doesn’t it? But the horror comes later. The things I saw. Whew, I wanted to go outside and eat some grass just to make me barf.) Anyway, like I was saying, as night drew closer, emotions seemed to grow more intense for all of us.

You see, the girls only had this kind of slumber party twice a year. It was an all out make-over, clothes swapping, hair doing, and Nobody really knew what else kind of night, because the girls never talked about it afterwards. Mr. and Mrs. Crow would only allow the girls to have such a get-together down in the basement rompus room, so that there was at least one full “empty” floor of house between the girls and their bedroom. “Too much of that cackling.” Mr. Crow would say under his breath, so as not to offend his little girl. And the giggling about boys, and the screaming at the scary movie, and the….well God only knows what else goes on down there.

Even though the girls were confined to the rumpus room in the basement, for the night, the boys of the house still had to find accommodations elsewhere. Mr. Crow insisted on decency in his home, and since the girls would be in their nighties and their dads oversized t-shirts, and since there would be bathroom visits throughout the night, he said that he would not have any peep shows in his hallway. What about Mr. Crow being in the house, you ask? Well, this was a Friday night. The Mr. and Mrs. would always go bowling every other Friday, come home late around 2am, and sleep till nearly 11am. So chances of an encounter were very slim. And the worse that could happen was one of the girls (which Mr. Crow treated them all like his baby girl Sandy) might see him in his boxers and t-shirt. And most of them have seen that already, and came back making comments about being sure they just saw their own dad in the hallway. However there were the few occasions when the girls were up real late, and very slap happy, and would say “My husband is gonna be just like your dad Sandy.” Mr. Crow is a healthy, happy, and handsome man. Most women get caught taking a second glance. Anyway, with these restrictions, it would be hard for the boys to implement their plan but then they are The Boys. Again, the plan was simple, but the results would be devastating if Operation “The BOB is BUSTED” goes well.

to be continued.

Dash of Time.

When we tally our time
Slower it grinds
To a halt it would seem now and then.
When our minds are care free
Time flies in full speed
Left wondering are we where it’s been.

Of course we all know
A boil will not grow
From the pot we now watch with intent
If the Boil is to roll
Then ones eyes must stroll
Onto other tasks without resent

If you think 'Come what may'
Then soon may you say,
Time has no hold on my form.
But look close in the mirror
The facts now are clearer
Times been holding you since you were born.

Not to worry, nor fret
Times not for regret
But a dash between dates on a stone.
How we spent it, says much
Of the lives we did touch
Or the roads we did travel alone.

Ray Winkleman. ©2007

Sweet sweet REVENGE. Part 1

"No, no! We should spray them with shaving cream and shave their heads with my dads rusty razor." Jarred said. "Oooooh Noooo, that would be to nice for them. When they change for gym class, we should put Vaseline in their shoes, itching powder in their clothes, and start a rumor about them having bugs. That'd teach 'em!" Stephen said. They went on for hours about what they might do to enact their revenge. They had earlier just started out up in the tree house comparing their baseball card collections, but soon began an all out brain scramble for the most exciting, most bizarre, most revealing, funniest and strange plan to date.

'bite their ankles, BITE Their Ankles!' Oooooo, I got it. Hike your leg and pee on their pillows. Bark and Bite 'em. Bark and bite 'em.' I tried to offer a few suggestions, but the boys just kept ignoring me. I always contribute {errrRuh Ruh} they just don't listen. Anyway, they finally decided on a plan that made all their other plans look silly. The only problem was...how were they going to convince the girls to go skinny dipping themselves. This was after all, supposed to be pay back for The BOB bringing the Grishums goats to the pond to eat the boys clothes and tent. The plan just had to be flawless. The girls would have to think that it was their own idea and each one would have to be convinced to play their own individual roles precisely as planned. If they could only get Olla to start the ball rolling then the others might follow...........NAW, it'll never work. Girls change their minds more often than they change their clothes, and these girls were too suspicious when either of the boys happened to talk to them in a nonviolent way. Well, so much for dyeing the pond green and all the girls along with it. I have to admit though, I do get excited when the boys concoct some of their plans.

Back and forth, between the boys, the ideas came pouring out like milk from a nose. Quick and hilarious. Jarred said "Squirt 'em with paint in art class just before it is time to go in front of the camera on picture day." Then Stephen offered, " Tape thumb tacks to the swings that The BOB claim as their own on the playground." then back "Ooo, we should catch snakes and frogs, and a ton of bugs and stick them in their desks." and forth " On Friday, we could get Chalkboard Eraser Clapping Duty, and then after rig up some rotten eggs to SPLAT 'em when they open their desks on Monday." The ideas went on and on, and most of them were very good and funny. They all had One MAJOR FLAW though....the boys would be first on the list of suspects, and the evidence would be so incriminating that even a blind detective could tell the boys were involved. "*#$% @#%$" Stephen said out loud. Jarred's mouth dropped open and his eyes were as big as silver dollars. "Shhhhhhhhh." he said looking and listening to see if anyone heard. "You want another mouth full of soap this week, you goober?" They both sat silent for a minute waiting fearfully and anxiously for someone to call out his First, Middle, and Last name, which meant BIG Trouble. But...a minute passed by, and they were right back at trying to come up with the right plan.

This kind of revenge requires one of two things: 1) months of planning, use of both the boys saved weekly allowances (which they both just got back after a month of paying for 2 broken windows at the Myers house.) potential permanent grounding for life, and total humiliation if it failed (and to the boys this would all be worth it for the chance to get even, despite having heard Grandma Myers repeat the bible verse that says that revenge belongs to God.)......or 2) a short plan, with immediate and all out destructive consequences for everyone. (the debate is still out on this one.)

The plan would end up a simple one. Not too much danger, not too much punishment if caught and convicted, and only humiliation for the girls if it even only worked a little bit. Sandy, Jarred's sister, was going to have another of her sleep-overs, which meant Jarred would have to leave the house. So the boys, in there young wisdom worked it out to sleep in the back yard up in the club house. They promised to use the bathroom before heading out, and thereby wouldn't need to use it all night. And that meant that there was a lesser chance of getting convicted, having the alibi "We were in the club house all night". What Jarred's parents didn't know was that sometimes Jarred would sneak out of his room to go watch some late night TV on that little black and white his older brother forgot that they borrowed. Mr. Crow tied a thick rope from the tree house to the back of their home. He knew that the when there were strong southern winds that the tree creeked, and wanted to make sure that if the winds kicked up, that it wouldn't take the boys on a short trip to the ground. Anyway, if Jarred could sneak OUT, it was only logical that he could sneak in to implement the plan. Jarred would just have to teach Stephen how to shimmy across that rope with out falling. All this added up to the boys being able to get in and out of the house to deploy the plan which now had a name. "Operation.........

To be continued.

Chapter 27 of: The never ending, ever so boring story.

"Mirror, mirror on the wall. They say you can not lie.
Reflecting us one and all, I say you do, here's why.
Everything I see in you, repeats of what I know.
But is it really all that true, like a magic show?
I wink my left, you your right, if I were over there.
Criss-cross and bounce from the light, shined on your silver glare.
Opposite is the key word, that makes you true or not.
Like yin and yang that have been stirred inside a boiling pot.
So I will give you part of truth, and part of lie as well.
As I continue brushing tooth, avoiding morning smell.
Now I go my way, and you yours, until we meet again.
When I come back to clean my pores, the zits seem never end.
And when I'm in need and I run, to you in hurried rut.
Help me look good, and don't make fun, or I'll break your silver butt."

Stephen bowed, smiled, and winked at the little red haired girl in the back of the class. She wasn't interested in his wink, but did find his poem amusing. It was poetry week, and all the kids had to write their own, and recite it in front of the whole class. By the stuttering and wet arm pits, you could really tell who was nervous. And Jarred, mostly dry, was up next. What Jarred lacked in public showmanship, he made up for in clever writing. Mrs. Stintenhutt (aka Mrs. Stinky Butt - the boys claimed that one day she farted for an hour after lunch time) would always tell Jarred about his potential for becoming a great writer. Mean while, due only to the fact that 90% of his involvement with the boys was seeing them in his office for discipline, Mr. Fricklemier (Pickle Buyer - like you didn't see that one coming) would tell Jarred about his potential criminal record if he didn't "Straighten up and flight right".

Jarred walked up to the front of the class and just stood there for a minute. "Go ahead Jarred." Mrs. Stintenhutt said. Jarred cleared his throat pointing at it and said "FROG". No laughter. 'Oh Great!' he thought. 'so this is where I die of humiliation'.

Jarred began...
"Far and away, looking back now,
it was the moon that jumped over the cow.
Rhymes of the nursery, by Mother Goose.
The rhyming was easy, the meanings obtuse.
Ring around the Rosy, about a death black.
And a Baa-ing black sheep, about income tax.
Humpty the egg? no! A cannon so grand.
And Tinker Taylor, the fortune of a man.
Yes far and away, look back now and then
But keep 'em going forward, teaching kids again"

Everyone of his class mates, including Stephen, just stared at him. Mrs. Stintenhutt had already planned to submit that poem to her the local college annual poetry contest.  She couldn't wait to see their faces when they heard the unknown poet was twelve years old.  She felt Jarred was years beyond his peers when he put his mind down on paper. The class...they just didn't get it.

Brrrrrriinnnnnng, the bell rang...books, pencils and kids were all moving rapidly. Giggles and whispers filled the room. Tap - Tap - Tap - Tap...WHAP went the yard stick on the desk. "SETTLE!" from the front of the room, was enunciated with sharp precision. "I dismiss this class. Not the Bell." the teacher proclaimed, for the 72nd time this year. Movement stopped, and all hands were clasped together and centered on each desk. "We will finish poetry week tomorrow, followed by a quiz on Friday." "awwwwww!" the class groaned. "Class dismissed."

All In Time

TODAY IS YESTERDAYS TOMORROW, ONLY IF IT IS NOW

SECONDS AWAY, MINUTES AGO, HOURS INSIDE IT BUT HOW?

MILES TAKEN ON INCHES, GIVEN ONLY IN TRUST

FOUR LETTER WORD YOU DIDN'T SAY, TURNING SLOWLY TO DUST

SOLID LAUGHTER, LIQUID ROCK, VAPOR H2-TEAR

WORKIN' WEEKLY, MONTHLY BILLS, BROKE THROUGHOUT THE YEAR

READIN' WRITIN' RITHMATIC', LEARN ME IF YOU TEACH

OPEN THE MIND, CROW BAR IN TRUNK, NOT TOO FAR OUT OF REACH

LISTEN TO PICTURES, TOUCHING THE SOUND, THE HEART IS SOMETHING TO SEE

STIR UP EMOTIONS, BLEND IN THE TRUTH, BAKING INSIDE OF ME

CONFUSED UPSIDE DOWN, INSIDE TO OUT, FINGERS AND KNEES ON THE FLOOR

GRAVITY LEARNED, ALL FALL DOWN, CANE HELPS YOU OUT THE DOOR

SLOWER QUARTER, PENNIES MACH FIVE, EVERYTHING STOPS ON A DIME

AT THE SPEED OF LIFE, OFTEN WE FIND, IT ALL EXISTS SOMEWHERE IN TIME

Ray Winkleman. ©2008

The BOB

Stephen thought that the name for the Girls club (if you can truly call it a club?!), "The B.O.B." was snicker snortin' funny. Mostly because he and Jarred had their own ideas about what the anagram stood for. "The BOB", he would say in his deepest voice, that hadn't yet started to change with his age. And of course, he thought that was funny, and he would snort and then snicker, which Jarred found hysterical, and he laughed his higher pitched vibrato giggle, which Stephen thought was even more funny. So then, one sniker and one jiggling giggle would turn into a belly hurting laugh fest, that neither one of them would be able to stop for at least 15 minutes straight.

B. (Bountiful) O. (On) B. (Beauty). Yes, that is what the girls said B O B stood for. It's not clear whether they came up with that name them selves or if one of the fathers thought that it would be a funny name for girly clan. But what is clear is that the boys thought that the girls had big heads, were complimented on their hair and wardrobes, and needed to stop sleeping with ugly sticks. (Boys!?) Care to take a guess what the boys would say that B O B stood for? Well, for starters the most often recited explanation, due to the repeating sleep overs the girls would have, was 'Baboons On Beds'. Next were 'Bottomless Overeating Bores' (That was for the pig fest they would have the morning after the sleep over.), 'Bitchy Ogars without Boyfriends', and finally 'Boob-less Orangutans Barfing'....with exception to Elly Brotsnicker, the girls were all, and I quote "as Flat as seasoned roadkill".

Okay so you now know something about Elly, for whom I am sure Stephen has and extra heart beat and a double take when she walks by. But what about the other Ogars, er uh I mean girls!? The best way to tell you about them is to give it to you directly from the Boys point of view. There's Mindy...brace face - big feet, Rhonda...always wears pink - winks all the time - stutters on words like Aluminum and Cinnamon (to be fair neither of the boys can say linoleum the first time they try), and Sandy...no real complaints except that she is Jarred's sister. Ewe girls. Also in the club or clan are Olla...short for Viola...well, the name Olla - occasional ear wax - and that Bob hair cut, Tammy...one green eye and one brown - hairy legs (her mom said she is too young to start shaving them) - always has garlic breath, and finally there is Nancy...always painted her finger nails green - the boys thought that her arms were too long - never wore shoes. That was okay for boys, but young ladies should be more dainty and have clean toes. For the record, I don't wear shoes, and I gotta say that at least Nancy knows what my paws feel while walking through the morning dew. What? Can't a dog like walking through the grass?!? Anyway, with all that the boys "thought" was wrong with girls, there was one very strange fact that seemed "way" to coincidental to be an actual coincidence. You see if you lined up the girls, side by side, according to height. Then if you placed the only single letter of their first initial on their foreheads, you would spell......

M-indy O-lla N-ancy S-andy T-ammy E-lly R-honda. You got it. M O N S T E R! And that is just what they were, when they invaded the tree house. Monsters.

The Club House

Not too far beyond the pink and white play house Jarreds dad built for his Baby Girl, and only daughter Sandy, was the club house he helped the boys build on the family planted Oak Tree. He insisted on helping so as not to have the boys come falling down to the ground with a plank of wood sticking out from some part of their body. The club house consisted of a trap door with a rope (For those fireman type exits, though if you weren’t too careful you would burn your hands and as Jarred can attest, you can burn a hole in your favorite Wranglers.), 3 windows (Each with a curtain made of denim patches. Stephen’s mom insisted on helping despite the boys many protest that the curtains would make it look like a sissy club house), and there were five apple crates for sitting, storing, playing checkers and card games on, and oh yeah the club house also had 'the shelf of wonder'. Upon the final “Fathers” inspection, the shelf earned its name because everyone wondered how that thing stayed attached to the wall with nails that didn’t seem to quite go in all the way. But it did stand firm, and miraculously could hold the weight of a pair of binoculars and the hammer that the boys broke – taped – and broke again – replaced the handle – and once again broke. Also on the shelf was the junk the boys thought would come in handy if there was an invasion. A box of BB pellets and two slingshots inside the ammo box Stephens Grandfather gave him.

The roof was strong, for those extra hot nights when the boys would want to go up top and stare out at the stars. The boys could also hide up there when they had that feeling that someone would actually look IN the club house while hunting them down . The boys had all their "war" gear up in the "fort" (of sorts), just in case. You know, just as a precaution to Canadian, alien, or female invasions. Semi organized, semi strewn about were 2 sleeping bags, a few flashlights, several bottles of flat paint in dark colors to use for camouflage along with an old military instruction book on how and when to use it. And flanking the door were the two rusted horse shoes the boys found on the floor of the pond, while once trying to recover a bike they rode off the end of the dock. The boys were in a habit of only spending an hour or so up in the club house before dinner each night. They had too many things to do on the ground and the tree would be more of a get-a-way, hide out, or summer sleep over location for them. Fishing, riding their bikes on the south trails far behind the Grishum's farm that take the long way to the pond, and spying on the Smither's Twins when they weren't at ballet class, or piano lessons, or archery practice were just some of the many things to keep them busy in Gruberville. "What babes" the boys would say in stereo about the Smithers twins. But they were still a bit too shy and awkward to out right talk to the girls. You know boys?! They think that their flipping their eyelids trick is equally funny to girls as it is boys.

Most recently the boys were up in the club house recounting their stash of comic books, and baseball cards. "Elly heard you call her 'Snot Licker' yesterday." Jarred said. "I know! She punched me in the stomach." Stephen replied. You see, Elly's last name is Brotsnicker. And the boys have a really dumb habit of rhyming names to gross, silly, or even evil sound-a-like type things. So when Elly had over heard Stephens so called nick name for her this last time, she walked up to him and said "Astupidboyabouttogethitinthebreadbasketsayswhat?" and Stephen replied "What?" and UMMMPH, he now understood what she said, and instantly was thankful that she didn't kick 10 inches lower, or punch 20 inches higher. "Yeah, a black eye would have been hard to explain to everyone. Ya know?!" Stephen said sorting out his rookie cards. "Oo oo oh yeah!" Jarred giggled back.

Mixture of Notions to Ponder (Simple I Thought to Think)

Simple I thought to think
Cause thinking is in the mind
My thoughts they all have a link
A chain of a different kind

Linking one to the next
Seemingly not with an end
My mind easily perplexed
From one thought there comes a blend

One idea simple and plain
Intermingled now with a cost
I search, oh but in vain
Its beginning not found and/or lost

Then Destination I seek
The mind traveled far and near
The search most commonly bleak
When found obliviously clear

Complexities consuming more thought
Simplicity the key to drink
My mind a notion it brought
So silly I thought to think.

Ray Winkleman. © 2006

The Day of the Cat...part two.

“Here kitty kitty!” Jarred called calmly. Stephen had “borrowed” the clippers his dad used to cut his and brothers hair with. “Mrs. Crow wants to use them.” he said running out the back door. Then darted back to catch it before it slammed. That would have been a 10 minute lecture on “this house is not your playground” and “if you break it, it’s going to come out of your hide….money does not grow on trees”, followed by a round of stepping in and out of the door way ten times, not allowing Mr. Myers to hear you do it. Otherwise you would have to start from the beginning.

The cat took a few steps forward, hesitated, and then darted up the tree into the club house. “Perfect!” Jarred said. The boys would plug the clippers into the extension cord they had hooked up a few weeks before. They had a sleep over and wanted to stay up late and watch the Late Show on Jarred’s older brothers 5 inch black and white TV. So Stephen brought the can of Crisco he bought from the stores damaged bin, and Jarred brought half of a tuna sandwich to try and entice the cat. It squirmed, scratched, and hissed, but the boys were on a mission. At one point Jarred asked “did this thing just say HELP ME?” They both raised an eyebrow in a mirror type glance and then continued shaving. Then just as the cat seemed to begin to calm down, with out warning”Hisssssss” and just as swift as a female streaker in an all boys school, through the air a claw went swinging and made direct contact with the crotch of Stephens hand me down, warn out, Wranglers. “Aaaaaaahhhhhhhhh” oh the pain must have been like a giant 5 pound sewing needle being dropped on your……well you know. He looked. He HAD to. The damage was merely a scratch, but if felt like a gaping gash wound. The Crisco would have to wait until the girls gym class first thing on Monday Morning. They would feed and keep the cat in a dog carrier until then.

During the girls gym class, the boys would have their health and hygiene class. And as usual, every other week the teacher would send the boys out to wander the school and yard looking for evidence of good and bad examples of health. So the boys had the perfect opportunity to hide in the equipment closet where they had stashed the cat just minutes before. Miss Krisonplas, the girls gym, health, and home economics teacher had the girls for the first 45 minutes, and Mr. Stone had the boys for the same except the boys had wood and metal crafts. And as it was routine for the boys, these two had rhyming nick names, though they were still working on Krisonplas. “Kissin’ *ss”..….”Piss in Grass”…..and because she was so old, nearly 25, Krison-hag. Kids!?!

When the cage was opened and the cat slid out, oh the calamity. The chaos that followed would turn into a day the entire town of Gruberville would remember as “The Day of the Cat”. It didn’t help matters that they used most of the Crisco, but the cat was fairly large. They packed it on the hairless thing as well as they could, and now it was dropping and dripping all over the place. The other thing contributing to the folly was the new waxed gym floor. The custodian spend the better part of 10 hours on it over the weekend. So close your eyes and imagine a class of 17 5th grade girls first screaming at the sight of what looked like a Naked Greasy Rat, and then trying to catch the poor creature. Once the tennis shoes and shortening met with the fresh coats of wax, it was like “First time ice-skaters” meets the “Crisco Rodeo”. Round ‘em up, Mooooove ‘em out.

Girls were sliding everywhere. Some fell on their butts, others did splits, and at one point two of them, trying to hold each other up, looked like they were doing the Charleston. Stephen was reminded of some old silent Keystone Cops movie he saw. And Jarred had visions of Cartoons running through his mind. Any way you looked at it, it was just too funny, right up until Miss Krisonplas slid across the floor right into the slat vented door the boys were peeking from behind. BAM ! Right into the door. BAM ! Right into the boys heads. BAM BAM! Busted!

The punishment didn’t become as famous as the prank, but the boys thought that giving a bath to every cat in the neighborhood was a rotten way to start two weeks of reprimand. And because so many were involved, it just kept getting worse as the next set of parents got to invent a new and creative afternoons chastisement.

You “usually” learn as kids, that sometimes thinking that the Principles car looks good in toilet paper, or that melting crayons all over the new kids tuba mouthpiece, or even greasing a shaved cat sounds cool in your head. But exploring these things outside your heads, can sometimes have a direct impact on your backsides. These two boys never learn. And as for me…I’m a dog. If it were up to me, every cat in the neighbor hood would have been shaved. I still laugh as I dream of the calamity.

Henry the Dog.

The Day of the Cat.

Well, no one could have expected there to be such a big frog in Mrs. Crows ( Jarred’s Mom) special events purse, but then she never expected to leave it sit where anyone would bother with it. The front room closet was a good enough out of the way place for it. The problem was that the boys forgot about the frog and well, it died and bloated up too big to be just dumped or pulled out of the small hand bag. Mr. Crow used the same knife he cut the switch from the tree with, to cut the stitching from the bottom of the purse, just to get his wife’s things out without getting frog innards all over them. And after, with the mutual extended blessing of both of the fathers, the boys got a couple of swats each and a few extra chores for the week. Ouch. Will they ever learn? Hard to say but then the frog was discovered just one day after “The day of the Cat”. Oh for the love of sanity, was it even possible for a cat to be caught in such a condition?

It began with a game of “Dare Marbles”. You state your dare…someone agrees….you shoot. IF you hit your opponents marble out of the circle, he or she has to fulfill the obligation of the dare. If you hit one of your own marbles out of the circle, You have to fulfill the obligation. And if you miss altogether the dare goes into the kitty and starts stacking until……….Stephen and Jarred were both very good at Stacking the kitty, and the other night, just as duck was rolling in, there was a stack of three dares and one on the way. Stephen poised his best blue shooter and stated “DARE! Find, Kiss, and put in one of your moms purses, the biggest bullfrog we can find.” Jarred thought about it, for barely a fraction of a second (it was getting late and unfinished games seemed to often end in a round of arm punch exchanges, on the way home, to cancel out the dares). “Dare Accepted” he said with a sound of ‘what am I saying’ in his voice. Then even before Jarred finished exhaling his words, Stephen shouted “LEFTOVERS!” “Oh man!” Jarred cried out. He was too late to call “No Leftovers.” Leftovers meant that there would be no punches to cancel out dares. “&#$@ it.” He said. Stephens eyes got big, he looked around, and then laughed a nervous loud hic-up burp kind of laugh and a slimy one came out his nose.

The dare kitty was loaded. “That means I’d have to stick and egg in PickleByers (nick name for Principle) tail pipe. Pants the Jenkins kid at the next basketball game. Catch, shave & grease down, and then release a neighborhood stray cat into the school gymnasium during the girls next class, AND now the frog. Holy Crap Batman!” Stephen laughed uncontrollably until they both heard the back fire of Jarred’s older brothers car, which meant he was going to work, and the boys needed to get home before the street lights came on. Both their faces took on a look of serious play. Stephen crouched down, moved his hand and shooter into place and shot……………….POW, Jarred’s blue green cat’s eye went flying out of the circle. His eyes closed in a dramatic kind of slow motion way. The boys walked home. Stephen whistled “The Chatanooga Choo Choo” while Jarred kept his head kind of low while kicking a rock down the street. Each time Stephen got to the Choo choo part of the song, he would poke Jarred on the arm or his ribs and snicker through his nose. Then from down the street the boys heard “ICE CREAM” shouted. They kicked up some dust and were now all smiles.
To be continued…

The Pond

It's kind of like the feeling you get just before your first real kiss. Not the kind from Mom or Grandma, but your first REAL kiss. Your stomach churns, your head floats, and you heart races like two boys chasing after the ice cream truck on a hot summers day. I mean, it's just the norm when it was just the guys. No big deal, and pretty much common sense if you ask me. You didn't wanna get your clothes wet, especially since it gets cold at night.

The boys were camping, and a swim would always be the best part. The pond was only 3 miles away, just past the Grishums farm. Funny how no one ever really seemed to know what their farm was for, or what they did over there. I'd heard strange stories of odd lights at night, and weird smells in the fall, and oddly no dogs or cats to be heard of. Just Clyde and Prudence. Those two would chase you off the property faster than most dogs could. Oh, but let me be clear about this. Those aren't the first names of Mr. and Mrs. Grishum, their names are John and Ellie. Nice folks too. Always patted me on my head when they saw me in town. But no, Clyde and Prudence were the names of the Grishums goats.

Stephen got to the camp site first, set up the tent, and started to gather up some kindlin'. Mean while Jarred had to finish his sisters chores for the day, because she snitched on him for filling her pretty pink shoes with worms. So when Jarred got to the camp site he passed the paper cup to Stephen, that he dumped the worms into from his sisters shoes. "They aren't all squished are they?" Stephen asked. "Naw, just a little smelly from being where Sandy's feet have been." He replied. Stephen took a quick sniff, and started to make a gagging/choking sound, then reached over and placed that cup right under my nose. "Want some Henry?" They both just snickered, grabbed their fishing poles, and headed toward the dock. Most of the time Jarred would catch the MOST fish, and Stephen seemed to always catch the BIGGER ones. None-the-less, they were gonna eat good tonight. On his way to the pond, Stephen would snatch up and borrow his grandma's cast iron skillet, with her blessing of course. She was onto the boys shenanigans most of the time, but tolerated it cause....well just because. Grandmas Love could explain many a thing in life. Though grandma could hold her own, and had many a time evened up the score keeping them boys in remembrance of who was top dog, or queen bee. Like the time those two boys snuck into the cookie jar for some of grandmas Oatmeal Surprise cookies, and Surprise ! ! there was hot sauce in 'em. Them boys were trying to suck down water so fast, it came out a nostril or two. Anyway, to be added to the fish, later placed on some camping plates, Jarred would often bring some almost stale potato chips.  They took turns bringing the quart bottle of some local brand soda.

After three hours of soaking in the sun, and having caught all the fish they wanted, the boys decided to take a long weeks well deserved swim. After all, it was Friday. They had almost cleared the week without getting into some kind of trouble (they pants another kid in gym class), and all their chores (plus Sandy's) were done. Even Saturday chores. So after a quick scan of the terrain and pond, they tossed their clothes into the tent and ran for the end of dock as if some crazy Labrador Retriever was chasing them, nipping at their legs. And there was.  Me.  After that cup of worms up the nose, I had to do something to show 'em I was the Alpha Male. "GERONIMO" and "BOMBS AWAY" echoed off the near by pines on the other side of the pond. SPLASH, SPLASH and SPLASH again. We all hit the water, and those two sunk to the bottom. Only eight feet deep around the dock.  They splashed around and kept diving to the bottom for some kind of buried treasure.  I just "dog" paddled to the shore, shook the water off, and went back to the dock to sit and watch.  They swam a couple of races from the dock to the patch of Lilly pads and back, and just when they decided to call it quits and headed toward the dock's ladder...we saw 'em. Clyde and Prudence were chewing on everything in the vicinity of the tent. Clothes, the tent, and the bag of chips.  All scattered around the camps site.  The boys hooted and hollered, and I barked trying to scare them two goats.  All to no avail.  So just as the bare bottom of Jarred started to come up out of the water, coming from behind the blackberry bushes straight toward the dock was Sandy and the rest of her lil entourage of girls, known as "The BOB".  There were many a theory about the origin or meaning to the name of The BOB. Was it from the Bobby socks they would all wear, or from that hair cut style? The girls just claimed it was an acronym for Bountiful On Beauty.

Quickly Stephen grabbed Jarred's arm and pulled him back into the water as the girls approached. The gar-girls (Stephen pet name for the BOB) giggled and laughed, the boys hollered, and the goats kept on chewing. The boys tried to swim to another part of the pond to try and hide in the weeds, but would get there at the same time as the girls would. Over and over for 25 minutes the girls followed them around, taunting them about being naked (going back to the beginning for a moment, the boys found out the hard way, that even if only your underwear was wet, it made for an uncomfortable nights sleep, and besides, the girls would have made more fun if they had seen the boys in their water stretched Fruit of the Looms). Finally it came down to just three choices. Stay in the water until it got too late for the girls to be out, act like men and act like it didn't bother them to be seen and come out of the water to chase the goats away, orrrrrrrrrr.............(my personal favorite) dive to the bottom of the pond, grab a huge handful of goop and slime, and start slinging it at the girls and goats.

The boys were not "men" yet, and their fingers and toes were getting to be pretty pruney, And slinging mud WAS allot of of fun. So they dove and they slung. Several times to the bottom and Jarred caught hold of an old coffee can and scooped up a load of slimy mud. Then Jarred had what he would later call a moment of brilliance. We just called it a thought. One of the boys could cover his front side with the can and chase the goats away and collect some clothing.......but who. "not it, Not It, NOT IT" echoes bounced around the area and then in unison, "ROCK, PAPER, SCISSORS" they shouted. They played best 2 out of 3 and Stephen won. Or did he lose. They hadn't decided if winning meant staying in the water or wearing a Folgers Logo on your Lower parts, so they had to play again. And this time Stephen definitely lost.

Coffee can covering his privates, and Jarred fast balling mud at his back to get him moving faster, Stephen ran screaming like a lunatic toward the goats. Clyde and Prudence bolted up the hill toward the farm. Then Stephen grabbed what clothes he could find, dove into the now dilapidated tent and put his pants on backwards, and his t-shirt on inside out. Seconds later he came out and grabbed one of their dinner's fish and began to chase the girls around with it. He actually made cheek to fish contact with Viola, and then tossed it at Nancy which made her jump to miss getting hit and when she landed her feet met with a fresh goat patty. Jarred cheered his best friend on taking one step up the ladder, with every few the girls were taking away from the dock. The girls ran away laughing about coaxing the goats to follow them to the pond. The boys later decided that there were absolutely consequences to be paid for the now NOT so mosquito repellent tent damage. But no plans until tomorrow after they would have had a good fish dinner and a decent nights sleep.

While cooking the 3 fish that didn't come into contact with a girl or a goat, the boys concluded that the afternoon wasn't a complete loss. The boys spent the rest of the evening chuckling over each others face expressions, when they spotted the girls seemingly seeing them in their birthday suits. And all I can say is sorry folks, but there aren't any pictures of the whole incident to go along with the story. I am a dog after all. Yes, that's right. I am the boys dog Henry. I get to pal around with my two best friends in the world who are also best friends to each other. So much so that when I came into their lives they couldn't decide who should get to keep me so they decided to share. And we all like it, just the way it is.

Until Next time,
Henry the Dog